Tauriel: Dwarf-Friend in Elven Home
by Kalawyn Tawariell
Summary: "Banished from the only home she had truly known, she knew not how to seek for comfort for her broken heart, cracked at first from banishment, broken further by the abandonment of her best friend, and then shattered completely by the death of a dwarf she knew she could have completely loved." Two-shot. Mentions of Kili.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: This is going to be a two-shot. I tried writing the whole thing as one, but then the word count became ridiculous, so it's now being split in half for the sake of my sanity and to be more manageable.**

**Tauriel is an elf, so I tried to write it as if time moved slowly for her. This chapter mostly deals with Tauriel after BOTFA and going to Valinor. The second chapter will deal more with seeing Legolas again and developing their new dynamic.**

**I already know how it ends, so I'll hopefully have it posted before the end of the month. Thanks!**

**Disclaimed.**

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Tauriel: Dwarf-Friend in Elven Home

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"_Why does it hurt so much?"_

"_Because it was real."_

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It took years, but Tauriel did leave Middle-Earth for the safety and restoration of her race's true home, Valinor. Yet, to an elf, the time it took for her to return there had been but a fleeting span even for her as a younger First Born. Banished from the only home she had truly known, she knew not how to seek for comfort for her broken heart, cracked at first from banishment, broken further by the abandonment of her best friend, and then shattered completely by the death of a dwarf she knew she could have completely loved. The years helped dull the ache; however, a hurt of that kind never fully healed. Instead it severed sinew and bone like that of a Morgul blade, and the memory of the pain sat fresh in her soul, renewed on anniversaries or simple reminders. So, yes, one could say the years had been kind to the she-elf, but the sentiment held no value to one who dwelt immortal.

Living in Dale had seemed like a good idea at first. It was still near enough to her first home that she did not feel like an outsider, and it was close to the people she had fought to defend. They needed her, and at that time, she needed to be needed. She helped where she could: looking after Bain, Sigrid, and Tilda while Bard worked on rebuilding his home and getting his people settled, organizing the fighters, training archers, and setting watches on the surrounding lands, especially east and south. For the first few years, it was enough. Tauriel kept herself busy, but even in the night, when all the others slept, her heart ache returned, making her chest feel hollow and cold. Dale was lovely, but in the shadow of the Lonely Mountain, it was also the place where she had fought so hard and lost so much. The reminders, the scorched earth and the charred stone, cleaned and repaired, could not return it to its original form. The scars still remained as her keen elf-eyes could tell, and living under the shadow of Raven Hill started to wear on her until it became too much for her heart sickness. She began to feel cold and weak. Understanding her peril and still being too stubborn to give in, Tauriel took leave from Bard, King of Dale, and Dain, King under the Mountain, and started her journey west.

Lothlórien welcomed her. The trees reminded her of her first home, and Galadriel needed only one glance to know her sorrows. Tauriel stayed for some time amongst the trees, watching the stars and dancing by the Nimrodel where its tunes soothed her wounds and helped her heal. She began to feel warm again under the golden leaves, so she stayed. The wholesomeness of the land encased her, and it became the closest thing to home she had now, even though the loss of Mirkwood still echoed in her mind. She met Arwen Undómiel during the Lady's stay, and when Tauriel did not patrol the borders and needed the female company, they would walk together through the night, a pair of she-elves glittering in starlight. Tauriel learned from her more detailed histories of Middle-Earth and the bittersweet songs of their people, of Beren and Lúthien, of Arda before it was made round by Eru. And when Arwen was busy with her grandmother, she spent her time with Haldir. He respected her lethal skills, and she became an equal. She ran through the trees and killed any orc that dared to near its borders. Tauriel also appreciated that the Lord and Lady of the Golden Wood would never dismiss aid, despite their secret home, and never allowed the filthy, black blooded brutes to survive anywhere near their borders.

However, when a roguish ranger entered the woods one day with a blonde friend in tow, the sanctity of her sanctuary became tarnished, and she froze. She had not been ready to see him again. Legolas had his own issues, she knew, but it did not sit well within her that he had left her without even saying goodbye after the battle. He had gone with her to track the orc-pack; he had defended her in the face of his own father; he had assisted her on Raven Hill… it was all true. For all her challenging him, for all her intent to help him become a better ruler, a more compassionate heart, a better elf, she really did try to be a good friend, yet he had gone. And it hurt. Valar, did it hurt, almost as much as watching the life drain from Kili's eyes and feeling the warmth leave his skin… Galadriel knew, obviously, and allowed her leave along with a sturdy Galadrim bow and a green cloak.

So, Tauriel wandered for a while after that. She had expressed the desire to see the world outside her realm once to Kili, while he was sitting in his prison cell recounting some of his adventures with traders. Even that memory stung… She did not seek refuge, rather she sought danger, hoping in some way that the trials would burn from her the pain and imperfections like dross from silver. Her hope continued to be that she could be better. She was young, she knew, and she only desired that more years would bring about a change within her heart and soul so she would not hurt so much, at least, so she would not think about the pain itself so much. She fought on the plains of Rohan and in the paths of the Misty Mountains. Sometimes, she wandered as far as the Brown Lands to the east, Lebennin in the south, Dunland and Enedwaith to the west. Her ears heard the rumors, and her heart understood their telling. By the time the news of Mount Doom's awakening reached her, Tauriel knew the simple truth: Sauron had returned and Middle-Earth grew more perilous by the day. She could not sit by and let it become stronger than her. That choice had been made for her once before, and her refusal of it had led to her banishment. So she fought. She watched in interest as Saruman fortified Isengard. She raided raids and scouted their scouts until one day, she found herself weakened by the sight of a fire moon rising above the horizon. She wanted to curse it, but could not find the strength to do so, for the memory gave her joy within its sting. Caught utterly off guard, the goblins caught her at the feet of the Misty Mountains. Tauriel fought as she could, but in the end, she was pursued until she found herself near the Bruinen. Injured in her attempts, she thanked the Valar as she found refuge across the ford. The waters rose and protected her, and then she was greeted by two tall, dark haired he-elves, who looked far too similar for it to be a coincidence, before she almost passed out from the exhaustion of her pursuit and the heaviness in her chest.

Escorted, well, more specifically helped, by the Sons of Elrond, Tauriel found herself in Rivendell. The elf-realm was completely opposite from all she had known. Nestled in waterfalls and rivers, protected by cliffs, and open and airy to the sky, she felt freedom. Elrond welcomed her, of course. Galadriel had mentioned the young she-elf might find her way there someday, and Arwen had mentioned her. He took her under his care, treated her wounds, and let her wander wherever she would. For a short time, Tauriel took delight in seeing Arwen again. They enjoyed each other's company for a time until the fair lady returned to her mother's people, and Tauriel was again, left alone. While in Rivendell, she learned Legolas had wandered with the Dúnedain for some years and had split from the ranger named Strider as the latter had business in the south that he could only see to alone. Elladan and Elrohir regaled her with tales, and she traded with ones of Haldir and his brothers. In the end though, the memories of Legolas, the disappointment and disbelief in his eyes, always made her heart ache, and they were almost always accompanied by the devastation that was Kili's loss. At that painful sight playing again behind her eyes, the ache turned into sharp pains through her chest. During those times, Elrond noticed that she did not glow quiet as much as a First Born should and noticed how she tried to rub her hands together for warmth. It concerned him, so he intervened as all older, wiser, world-worn elves did, and which irritated those who were younger.

Lord Elrond brought her news that Bard had fallen ill from old age, and Bain's coronation was set for the spring. While the news of Bard's impending death saddened her, it did nothing to intensify the pain in her chest for it was far too sharp to begin with. However, the news of his successes during life gave her great pride for her old friend. It had been twenty years since she had set foot in that part of the world, but for the sake of her former charges, she felt it necessary to see his children. So she went, just as she was sure Elrond had wished for her to do. Seeing the happiness of her fully grown charges, despite the grief of their father, was both curious and assuring to Tauriel. It reminded her that despite loss, there still could be joy. Dale had grown and thrived under Bard's rule, and now it was Bain's turn, and at his coronation, Tauriel could not have beamed any more than if she truly had been his mother. The dancing, the feasting, the music lifted her heart, and then it promptly fell when she saw a few familiar dwarven faces. Only Balin came to see her, almost as if sent as an emissary. He bowed with his snowy beard brushing the floor, and then produced for her a silver necklace with a pendent fashioned with blue and white gems that sparkled faintly, as if imbued with an inner light. It reminded her of the night sky.

"Bofur remembered hearing Kili say you belonged in starlight." Balin began, "It was your favorite kind of light, as an elf and all, he said. We hoped, what's left of Thorin's Company that is, you would accept this, Lady Tauriel, as a token of our goodwill, and as a reminder to us and to you, that not all Elves and Dwarves are enemies."

Tauriel smiled faintly at the white haired dwarf, knelt before him with misty eyes, and swept her long, coppery hair off to one side. Balin took the gesture in stride, and as gracefully as a boorish old dwarf could, he fastened the creation around the she-elf's graceful neck.

"I name you 'Tauriel, Dwarf-Friend,' my lady. Safe passage is granted to you in any dwarf-realm for the service you have done for our kinsman and our people."

She swallowed hard as her throat seemed to have a difficult time to speak. A single tear fell from a green eye as she replied in her thick with emotion, "I am honored, Lord Balin."

He gave her a reassuring smile, "Perhaps, we shall see you feast with us in Moria, once we have reclaimed it."

Tauriel stood as her brow furrowed, "I do not know how I would fare in dwarven caves, good dwarf, especially since it is still plagued by goblins."

"Ah, yes. Well, I am beginning to think of a plan for that! It will take some years to prepare, but I do not doubt our will to reclaim our homeland. We did so with Erebor! Why not Moria?" He replied with an audacious gleam in his eye.

She felt the need to remind him, so she spoke her words softly, "But the cost, Lord Balin? You must remember the cost."

His smile turned sorrowful, and Tauriel could see her own sorrow echoed in the old dwarf's eyes. She gave a nod of her head as her fingers lifted to brush her new pendant, "Thank you for your gift. I wish you every blessing on your endeavors, but I must away."

Tauriel left Dale with a still heavy heart and wasted no time in going to the Grey Havens. She stayed in the care of Círdan only long enough for the shipwrights to build a boat and send her to her true home. It was not the sea-calling that sent her there, rather the pain of what-ifs and what-could-have-beens, especially whenever she crossed paths with a dwarf. The ache would rise up inside of her again, and then she would focus on the coolness of the pendant around her throat. It only then occurred to her that somehow, the skill of the dwarfs had infused or captured within the gem the light of her beloved stars.

When she arrived through the shimmer of a grey curtain, the white shores on the edge of sight, she felt her weight lift from her heart, though the memory still remained in her mind. Brushing the pendant at her throat, a gesture that had become a habit, she waited at the bow until they made land. She disembarked to a celebration of elves singing and dancing and was taken to a place she could call home until she decided to do whatever she wished. This was Valinor, the Undying Lands, and a land of freedom from fear, evil, and pain. Time did not pass here. The darkness held no power here. For all the good things that yet remained in this world still dwelled here in Valinor until the arrival of Arda Healed.

She found peace and regularity for years, and really, what were years to the life of an elf in the Undying Lands? She walked among the Forests of Oromë, which she made her home, saw where the Two Trees once stood before the tainting of the world, heard the tales of the Simirils – and wondered briefly to herself if the Arkenstone had been one of the lost – traversed the Pelóri, and wandered on the white sand beaches. Once, she almost ventured to the Halls of Mandos, curious from Glorfindel's tales. She learned of Fëanor, and in all the knowledge she gathered, her wisdom grew, but ever she wore the necklace the Dwarves of Erebor had bestowed upon her. The sweet still tasted bitter if she dwelled on the memory for too long, but at least it was sweet.

Her predictable life was disrupted by the arrival of Elrond, Gandalf, Galadriel, Bilbo, and Frodo, sometime later. With them, they brought the tales of the One Ring, the Fellowship, the restoration of Gondor, and the defeat of Mordor. Tauriel wondered at her friends, new and old, and their feats, and Galadriel brought her news of Legolas' sea-longing. Such news was not something Tauriel thought her heart wondered about, but Galadriel knew it did, as she always did, and gave her the news. He would come, but the honor and loyalty of Legolas Greenleaf kept him in Eä for the time being.

When Bilbo eventually did die, many of the elves mourned his loss with laments that lasted through the night and into the next day. They celebrated his life and felt sorrow for his loss, but being as it was Valinor, such sad things did not have long life in the presence of the Valar. Frodo mourned, and Tauriel watched from a distance as he walked up and down the white beaches, seeking solace in the sound of the waves. It did not take long for her to decide to move forward and intrude on his self reflection. She could see the shadow of grief on his brow and in his brilliant blue eyes. He gave a small bow to her, to which she replied,

"I heard the King of Gondor decreed that you bow to no one, Master Hobbit."

A wry smile upturned a corner of his grim mouth, "We are no long on his shores, my lady. I hardly think his orders stand in the Elven Home."

"But we owe you a debt as well, Frodo. You defeated the darkness that plague my people for thousands of years."

"I did not do it alone." He replied as he stared out to the eastern horizon, "Sam… he is the hero in my story, I think. He saved me from myself when there was no one else. He didn't lose hope when I did."

Tauriel gave a closed her eyes briefly as she understood what he did not say. A sad smile graced her features as she stated, "You miss him. You miss his friendship."

Frodo nodded, "He is my dearest friend; he is my brother. I told him he would not always be torn in two, and now I am the one torn. Bilbo was everything to me for so long, and now without him, I have no one who understands the weight I bore. I have no family. The land is free from pain but not necessarily loneliness."

Her brows knitted, "What of Mithrandir?"

The hobbit gave a chortle, "Who understands wizards? I have not seen him for some time."

"Can I not be your friend? I understand the loss of friends, separated either by death or distance. Maybe would could help each other?"

The hobbit looked up at her, studying her features for a moment, "Legolas? He talked about you sometimes. I think the closer he grew to Gimli the more he regretted his actions after the Battle of Erebor. Leaving as he did, not fighting to lift your banishment, being jealous of a dwarf who proved himself worthy of you."

She sighed deeply, "He is not the only one who regrets."

"But when he comes, you two can tell each other that you forgive each other, can't you? You are elves and have forever to return to your old friendship."

"I wish it were that easy, Frodo. I do not believe our old friendship will be enough. We have changed much, both of us from what I hear. We are not the same elves, so it would be unfair to assume the same friendship."

"Maybe it won't be the same, Tauriel, but the friendship of true friends can span all distances: those in leagues and years."

"Wise words, Master Hobbit. I know when Samwise finally arrives, your world will not seem so empty. Until then, may I do?"

He gave her a hopeful smile tinged with sadness, sadness that she knew would lighten as time passed for him, and he nodded, "I would like that."

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Sixty-one years after Frodo and Bilbo's arrival came Samwise Gamgee, a Hobbit Tauriel had heard of oft, especially from the mouth of Frodo. They were both exceedingly old now, even for their relatively long Hobbit lives. However, the important thing was that the two best friends were granted some time together before they too left the world. The loss of their companionship weighed on her heart for a while, but Tauriel knew she too would have her friend returned to her. She healed quite a bit in the easy presence of Frodo and Sam. There were still times when a memory would catch her unaware, but the pain stayed for only a minute, and she learned to be thankful that she had the times at all, for they reminded her to be content in the joy the small moments had given her.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Part Two! I know it's weird. I am judging myself for it. Really, nothing negative you say will not have already crossed my own mind. However, I hope it alleviates some ishness feelings. Since Kili did actually die in the books, I did not feel as if I could keep him alive. The idea of the dwarves' afterlife is ambiguous at best, so I couldn't really figure a way to realistically twist it in our favour. The Gimli deal is a reeeaally big stretch. I claim creative license. **

**Review? Please? You know you want to press the button. It's like the big red button you always want to press but don't. Only this one is smaller and purple, I think. **

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**Hena: Thank you, my dear, for reviewing. It brings joy to my soul. I hope you like this conclusion. =)**

**O what fools…: I know who you are, so you can kill me later for not writing out your full name. ;) You brought up a couple points I didn't think about. So, I hope I did them justice. Thanks as always, my friend, for your input. =)**

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Tauriel: Dwarf-Friend in Elven-Home

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Fifty-nine years later, the elves still sang the songs praising Nine-fingered Frodo and Samwise the Brave, and it was during this time that a grey ship from Middle-Earth arrived, carrying curious company. It had been quite a while since a ship appeared on the horizon bearing their kin, and even though it was known at least one still dwelt on the other side of the sea ready to return, yet waiting to take his journey, the sight of the ship was a surprise. When Legolas finally returned to his people with a white haired dwarf, a grace in part allowed by Galadriel, the sight took away the Tauriel's breath so she stood, stunned, on the beach as the ocean lapped at her feet. The elves around her muttered and mumbled, but she just stood stock still, brushing her fingers at the pendant on her throat.

The sound of wood grating on the sand, signaling their landfall, forced her gaze upward from the motion of the waves. She caught sight of a blonde haired prince assisting a grey and white dwarf out of the contraption. Her elven ears could hear the gruff voice muttering Khuzdul curses – the sound of the language, not heard for many decades, forced the memory of a voice belonging to a dark haired, dark eyed dwarf whispering _amrâlimê_ to her on a lake-beach, forcing a sharp intake of breath as she was caught off guard – under his breath as he forced his older body to obey his orders to move. Once the dwarf was able to stand tall on the firm ground, the elf lifted his gaze to survey the small crowd gathering around the strange sight of a dwarf in Elven Home.

It did not take him more than a mere moment to find her. Tauriel knew her hair, despite being slightly smaller than other elves, would make her stand out. She could see the flicker of recognition and pleasure at the sight of her in his blue eyes, and he walked up to her and said, "Tauriel. I know I caused you pain, and I was unaware. I am sorry, and I missed you, _mellon nin._ Please, _goheno nin_?"

She swallowed hard, and then she found meeting his gaze was easier than she had expected, "I forgave you many years ago. We both did not act as well as we should have. Now, I think, we deserve to learn to be friends again."

The prince very well near beamed, and Tauriel could feel the contagious smile spread across her own face. He took her hand enthusiastically and practically dragged her over to where his companion still stood.

"Tauriel, _mellon nin, _this is Gimli, Elf-Friend. Gimli, _mellon nin_, this is Tauriel, Dwarf-Friend."

"Of course, laddie!" Gimli rumbled as he bowed until his white beard brushed the sand, "All dwarves know of the Lady Tauriel! My cousin Balin loved to tell stories about the Company before he went to Moria. We only wished she had graced our dwarf halls with her presence more often before she left our lands."

"Fair words, Lord Gimli," She inclined her head in return, "and I am sorry for the news I received about Balin. He was an honorable dwarf and very kind to me, even in their grief. I was saddened to hear of Moria from Frodo, but I confess I did not think much of visiting friends before I left. I had a great pain that has diminished since, but I am sorry to not have visited your lands. You must tell me of them. I have heard of your adventures, but I hope you will be kind enough to tell them to me first hand, along with whatever other stories you have of traveling through Middle-Earth with Legolas."

"Then you have not heard of our tales of the Glittering Caves!" He exclaimed.

"Or Fangorn Forest, _mellon nin._" Legolas reminded.

Tauriel smiled at the look of longsuffering on her fellow elf's face, "I have not at all, Gimli! I would very much like to hear about it."

It was all the encouragement the dwarf needed before he launched into, "The Glittering Caves are the best secret the Rohirrim have kept, hidden in the mountains under Helm's Deep! Legolas didn't believe they were as wonderful as I claimed, but he went because I promised him to go to Fangorn Forest, and it was not a thing I was looking forward to, so I made him go to the caves before he dragged me through a forest…"

Tauriel laughed a little to herself since the dwarf had not even set foot near a fire and food before he began his tale. She listened to him eagerly as they began the trek back up the beach and to one of the dwelling-towns many of the elves called home. Before they reached the grass-line, she could feel Legolas' eyes upon her, and so she inclined her head and let her own lock with his, and the warmth of his gaze and the comfort of his presence began to rekindle itself deep within her heart.

And then the pieces fell back together as they walked, listening to Gimli's tale. They did not lock as firmly as puzzle pieces should, but with a little time, she hoped they would settle. Simple. Just like that. As if no time had passed, great strife had been wrought and endured, or noble feats accomplished. Sure, the edges poked her a little bit, but even still it was as if she had seen him in the forest yesterday, even though the light in his eyes had changed and his posture had shifted. He held himself with more assertion, more confidence and less concern. She gave him another smile, but it was different this time. This smile held hope and promise, and it echoed in his eyes. A glimpse of white caught her eye, dragging Tauriel's gaze away from her new and reunited friends, and looking to her right up at the crest of the hillock, she saw Lady Galadriel wearing a knowing and rather pleased with herself smile on the old woman's face. The younger woman shook her head and then watched in awe at the pure joy that graced the old dwarf's features, who had stopped in midsentence, at his reunion with the Lady of Light.

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The days followed semi-smoothly after their arrival. Gimli's arrival ruffled a few elven feathers, but thrown a couple dirty looks by Legolas, the Prince of Mirkwood, Tauriel, the elleth guard, and even the Lady Galadriel, it did not take long for the pains of the past to be buried and the joyful playfulness of the elves reemerge. Gimli's height and beard became the spark for many jokes and funny songs, but if it turned too harsh by the lips of unwise lips, all Gimli had to do was let the Lady's gift peak out from the folds of his tunic, and words were silenced. Really, though, he did not have a hard time for long, especially considering the gift he would later receive…

Legolas and Tauriel fell back into their friendship. They sparred; they walked along the forest and beach paths, sometimes Gimli dragging behind, sometimes not. They told each other about their adventures, like soldiers swapping war-stories, but despite their friendship, there remained a wall. They may be friends, but they were not the same friends. It only took a few months, after settling in and Gimli becoming used to the constant company of elves, for it to appear in the way one would draw back from the other, either in the way they said a word or had an expression. They did not have the fearless relationship of before, when they challenged each other. But they ignored it for the most part. They were comfortable they way they were, for now…

…Until one day, a couple years later, they sat along the shore of the ocean, watching the waves come in as the tide went out, a lull in their conversation, yet content in their view of nature. Gimli snored loudly, a sound they both had become familiar with and desensitized to, somewhere behind them with his small collection of sea shells. Tauriel fingered her pendant in thought as she watched a seagull skim the water. Legolas had noticed the habit shortly after their arrival and had asked about the necklace, but Gimli had offered an explanation before Tauriel could say a word. She was thankful for it at the time. She could hardly know how to explain the topic when it was something they had yet to broach, and so soon after their arrival to Valinor, Tauriel had not been certain of all the changes to his demeanor as to how he would take it. So, she remained silent on the topic. Time had just passed and months had turned to years. After all, when a person lives forever, was there really a pressing need to address such things?

Yet, today is seemed the pair would cease their stalemate. Today, it seemed the puzzle pieces would be forced into alignment.

It had been a simple enough question, and the fact that it had not been raised before was due simply to the fact that time, if it could be called such a thing to the timeless, did not seem to pass at all in Valinor. Tauriel realized that Lothlórien had had a similar feel, which must have been due in part to the Lady's power and Lord Celeborn's. The thought of the ancient Prince of Doriath sparked the question,

"When do you think Lord Celeborn will sail? It does not seem right for Lady Galadriel to be without her husband."

Legolas' eyebrows rose at the inquiry, "I did not see him for many years while I was in Ithilien. I imagine he will be certain of his grand-children's fate before he leaves and give them some type of comfort before they depart the world."

Tauriel shifted her weight to look at Legolas more directly, "I suspected Lady Arwen's fate, but her brothers as well?"

"I am not certain. They could choose to stay. Aragorn was their brother. They fought alongside the Dúnedain for many lifetimes of men. They may make the choice of mortality, for their sister, and for their friendship with Aragorn, and yet they do love their mother fiercely." He paused to watch a seagull circle just off shore, "Celeborn will return, but whether he comes with his grandsons, I do not know."

Tauriel nodded, and then asked with a hitch in her throat, "What of your father?"

Legolas' voice was grim, but there still held a note of warmth in his melodic tones, "My father's stubbornness still keeps him in his halls with a small remnant of our people, too comfortable to leave. We made peace between the two of us before I left. It is enough for me to know that Middle-Earth thrives under new rule, but it holds no joy for me anymore." Legolas glanced at her for a moment, before looking toward some place by her feet, "Aragorn died ere we left. His reign was long and prosperous, even for a Númenorian, and I am proud to have known him and helped him in his journey. He certainly helped me."

"I am pleased that he was there for you, _mellon nin._ You always did need someone to be a challenging voice in your head to make you a better elf, and I am sorry for the grief of losing him as a friend."

"The pain was and is not too different from when I lost you, so I know I will survive."

"Legolas…" Tauriel attempted, startled by the sudden allusion to their past, but he just continued.

"And it is different. Because I loved Aragorn. He became my brother, and I his, and one of my best friends, and he stayed beside me in the darkest of times, and I with him. I loved you, Tauriel. I defended and fought for you, beside you. I understand you loved that dwarf. I understand it more now than I did then, since I have found qualities in them that I never thought I would find. You saw them, many years ago when we were both in Mirkwood, in the eyes of a young dwarf-prince. I am sorry I did not believe you then. His life ended far too soon. But I had to watch you defy all the expectations of our people, and being in love with you myself, watch you fall for another, not an elf, but a dwarf, and know you did not love me."

Tears stung behind her green eyes, "But I did! In a way… but your father, he would tell me things and discouraged anything I might possibly have. I was bound by duty as a Captain. And then after… I couldn't go back. They would not have accepted me again, and you were there when your father banished me."

"I would have accepted you. I did accept you! But you never saw that, did you?"

"I – "

"I went to Raven Hill with you! I challenged my father! Did that all mean nothing to you?"

Tauriel closed her eyes and breathed deeply through her nose and then exhaled out her mouth. She succeeded in keeping the memories of pain away; indeed, they were only memories since the healing in found here. Yet, she knew she owed him at least an apology, "I have been through that day a thousand times in my head. There are things I wish I had said and done, but the wishings and wantings of what-if's are not going to change the fact that I was as wrong as I believed you to be. I see now that as much as I thought you abandoned me, I abandoned you. We both ran away, it seems, from our closest friend when we needed the company the most. You asked for my forgiveness when you arrived." She took another deep breath, realizing now that the forgiveness had only been one-way, even if it had not mean to be so, "I am sorry, Legolas Greenleaf. _Goheno nin, mellon nin_?"

After a few long moments, he gave her one of his soft smiles.

She returned his smile as she played with the pendant at her throat. He caught her busy fingers with his and laced them together. The action surprised her, but it also filled her with the wholesome warmth she had been missing in their friendship since his return.

They sat in silence again, watching the blue of the sky change shades as the day progressed on. They let the new found wholesomeness engulf them, and they sat contented, holding each other's hands and listening to the snoring of their dear friend. Eventually, as the hours passed, they watched as the stars began to peak out and shimmer into the oncoming night.

The starlight reminded Legolas of the pendant again, and he offered, "The dwarves made it for you to remember their second dwarf-prince."

He felt her fingers tense at his breaking of the silence, and it took a moment for her to recover her faculties, "Kili, yes." She forced herself to continue in their new found stability, but then realized it was not as heard to tell him what was inside of her as it had been only that morning. She let her guard fall, "His memory is a constant presence in my heart, but I have grown that it no longer bears me such pain. It is only a sense of emptiness. I wonder what could have been, but to know that I had even a small piece of what it meant to love someone is enough. It helps me understand how Luthien could have stayed with Beren, and now Arwen with Aragorn."

"You have grown wiser, my friend." He whispered as he squeezed her hand.

"I am not as young, but that has no meaning. You need to tell me why you left, after the battle."

He heaved a sigh and let himself fall backward in the sand, their fingers still interlaced, "I saw you leaning over Prince Kili's body, and I saw how broken you were that I could not bear it. In my foolishness, I left and met my father and we… we grew apart, not that we were ever close to begin with, but he loved his power, and you challenged me to care for the world. Now I have learned. I did love you, Tauriel. I would love you still."

And then he kissed her fingers.

She asked, in the cooling air as the night began, "You accept then, that my first love was for a dwarf?"

"I do. Can you accept that my first love was for you?"

She hesitated, "I do not know, Legolas."

He turned his body inward so he faced her, using his free hand to guide her eyes to his own, and he said with all the conviction he could, "I will not be separated from you as he was, Tauriel."

A solitary tear dripped from her left eye, "I know."

Their silence stretched as they continued to converse with their gaze. They had not even realized the snoring had stopped until they heard Gimli's gruff voice groaning, "Would you just kiss the lass already laddie?"

They both blushed, and then laughed, but Legolas took Gimli's advice anyway.

The pieces finally locked and laid flat.

… … … … … … …

Legolas could not replace Kili. Of course, the fact that Kili had not been safe had been part of the reason she had fallen for him. He had been different and full of mystery, dark, enchanting, and sweet in a time when world had been harsh, full of hatred, and greed. The regret that she never got to delve into those depths with the constant speculation of "what could have been" ceased to tear her heart asunder. The reality she saw now was that they did not have much of a future. Hindsight it twenty-twenty, and even though she had been banished, that did not mean Kili's people would have accepted her, especially since he was of the line of Durin and a prince among his people. However, that had been her in the past. It had been some years, and she had almost faded a few times, but now, now she was older and more seasoned in the grief of life. Once in a while, she could still feel his cooling lips under hers when she had kissed him, often wondering how he would have kissed her in return. But then Legolas would capture her lips, and he was warm, strong, and alive. It only took a few of his searing kisses in the forest or on the beach for Tauriel to let go.

However, Legolas helped her feel whole and alive again. They had changed, and they had learned. Eventually, Tauriel found herself loving the Prince of Mirkwood as much as he loved her. It was a different love, of course, solid and firm, built on years of experience and friendship, and it burned low and hot. And at times, as she grew accustomed to it, the passion began to follow, fierce and wild. So when he finally did ask for her hand, many years later, she said yes.

They married at moonrise, the edges of the orb flaming, and the stars shining. They had a daughter some years after, and they named her Kiliel in honor of their long departed friend who had taught them much about the world, despite how short they each knew him. Then the only dwarf in the Elven Home, named Elf-Friend, became the godfather of the only elf ever named for a dwarf, by the only Elf ever named Dwarf-Friend. Gimli would tell stories to his god-daughter of their adventures when they had been younger in the Blue Mountains. Kiliel grew and, despite the possibilities, was quite reckless for an elf. She learned all about her namesake, about the dwarves, and how two unlikely souls became kindred spirits despite odds. And she was proud of her name sake's heritage. When the elleth came of age, Tauriel gave her the necklace the dwarves had forged for her. The light of the star belonged with the young girl who's eyes were untainted by war and grief, whose light would not be dimmed.

… And Gimli? Well, the Valar granted Gimli immortality since his circumstances were already special – and really, why not? They already had an Elven Dwarf-Friend, a Dwarven Elf-Friend, and an elfling named after a dwarf – so he did not age, but rather seemed frozen in time. He was not always happy about it, especially when one of his knees would ache, but there were elf healers for that kind of thing. Besides, he got to experience the world as no other dwarf had, and he got to spend it with two of his closest friends, and their daughter – they became his family – in the whole of Eä.

And at the end of the day, Tauriel and Legolas smiled with their child. That made it all worth it.

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**A/N: I know it's weird. I have already judged myself for all of it in every way imaginable. Nothing negative you say will be new to me. Anyways, review? Maybe? So I know that maybe it's not as bad as I think?**


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